Don’t worry, all zero of my loyal readers! It’s been a very busy time full of a lot of work and shows, so I haven’t been able to focus attention on the blog. But rest assured that my churning, frothing hate for Prometheus is no less churny or frothy. I’ll be back soon with more posts where I discuss:
- How The Scientists In This Movie Are An Affront To The Very Idea Of Science
- How To End Your Movie With A “Wait What The Fuck Just Happened”, or, When You Decide Your Real Antagonist Is A Giant Squidly
- How Is It That You Can Cast Idris Elba In Your Movie And Have His Only Discernible Characteristics Be That He Likes Sex And Christmas
And more! If there are things you’d like to see me cover, please feel free to leave them in the comments. If there’s one thing I’ve learned in the process of writing this blog, it’s that Prometheus is a collective wound on all of our psyches, one we can only heal through a lot of capital letters and shouting about WHY IS ANYTHING THE WAY IT IS
See you soon!
LYLAGOPWAHPACAPI, INAITTVIOF,S,T,R,ANHFSIYM
(Love You Like A Group Of People Who Also Hate Prometheus And Actively Consider It A Personal Insult, If Not An Insult To The Very Ideas Of Filmmaking, Sense, Taste, Reason, And Not having Fucking Squidlys In Your Movie)
REASONS I HATED PROMETHEUS 
Yes, please put up more posts about this dung heap. And you’re wrong, your page has more than zero fans. Keep the hate coming.
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I meant to write “dung heap of a movie”.
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It applies either way. Thanks Steven!
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“LYLAGOPWAHPACAPI, INAITTVIOF,S,T,R,ANHFSIYM”
awesome. 😀
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How about the fact that the entire crew instantly turn into surly a-holes the second the ship lands, despite the fact these ostensible experts should be beyond excited at having a chance to participate in what is surely a once-in-a-lifetime, career-defining experience?
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Oh my god! I know! WHY?!
In the original script it was revealed that they had just been offered the job blind for triple the pay – which is why no one knew why they were there. But when they “rewrote” it, why didn’t they add something to explain? And wouldn’t you be excited to be on a trip to discover the origins of mankind, if you were a scientist by vocation?
Thank you for this. You’ve totally stoked the fires of WRATH. I shall write a post immediately!
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How can you be offered triple pay FOR A JOB THAT DOES NOT EXIST YET? THIS I ASK YOU. In addition to the super exciting task of discovering the origins of biological life, these people are being given an awesome interstellar spaceship ride TOTES FOR FREE. If Pruneface Pearce is young enough to give a TED talk in present day circumstances, that means the movie takes place in a future not so far off from our own. As such, these morons should be super excited to be taking advantage of a presumably rare opportunity, not angry at life for no reason whatsoever!
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I have still not forgotten/will never forget you. I eagerly await your post on the bullshit science of this movie, because I will never understand how/why you’d assemble a crack team of scientists whose main motivator seems to be that they believe they can fly, or some shit.
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